Books: What I Am Reading Right Now - July 11, 2014

I should mention that a couple of these I have read before, but I like to sit down and revisit them annually because I enjoy them so much. I put an asterisk beside them.

The latest are:

Japan: DK Eyewitness Travel

Jonas Jonasson’s Novels

Parenting, Illustrated with Crappy Pictures by Amber Dusick

*Archangel by Sharon Shinn

*The Kind Diet by Alicia Silverstone

Dragon Age: The World of Thedas

Silkworm by Robert Gailbraith/J.K. Rowling

What have you been reading lately?

~Ange



Copyright 2014 Lucky 33: Stories, Experiences, Perspectives, and Opinions of a Woman Who Made It To Her Thirties.

Video Games - July 10, 2014

I thought when I would start the first blog with regards to my hobbies it would be about writing, given the blog that is happening here.  Instead I have chosen to speak about video games and my reasons why I have such an attachment to them.

I am the type of gamer who has had the pleasure of experiencing many different kinds of consoles over the years, and I have some favourites for each of them; which I will list at the end of this entry.

Yes, I am a gamer! Perhaps not as hardcore as some people I know, but I do love gaming.  I have been playing in arcades and on home consoles since I was three years old.  Something my Dad likes to brag about.  Apparently I impressed many teenagers at the arcades when I was a toddler.  My eye and hand coordination was that good, something I noticed more as I got older, because I broke many records on those big, awesome, noisy, joy-stick machines.  Even now if I enter into an arcade I feel a wave of nostalgia and go hunting for something that I may want to try.

I have many other things that I love to do. Probably a big part of why I, “dabble in everything,” (as my anthropology professor once said) is because of my parents.  Mom and Dad were excellent at ensuring that everything was in moderation, and there would be time limits and scheduled days of the week if they felt one hobby was being focused on too much.  Even now, when I feel I am paying too much attention to one of my passions, I remind myself of other things I enjoy.  For instance, I am an outdoors type of individual, and enjoy physical activities much more than anything; hiking and walking being the biggest ones, and I have to watch because sometimes that’s all I want to do.

Video games, for me, are like being a part of a really good T.V. show, or film. If the plot, music, and activities or missions in the game all compliment together really nicely to my eyes, ears, and brain, then I am totally hooked. Often times there have been games I absolutely adore that most of my friends and other hardcore gamers I meet will have never played. It feels like my own personal diamond in the rough I have discovered.

There is one aspect of my love for video games that is both a pro and a con about gaming for me.  If the creators have made a game where I am so immersed in it that reality fades away for many hours, then they have made me a very happy gaming gal. However, having achieved my full attention in this way is also a negative, because I am so immersed in that video game that reality fades away for many hours.

As someone who loves to get all artistic and make things with my own hands, I greatly admire and am in awe of people working in the video game business. The details in the art work and the graphics is equally as amazing to me as any piece of art at a gallery or by a local artist that has moved me in some way. When I play a game that fills me with envy and admiration in equal fervor, then that makes me love the artists’ talents even more; for I know I may never possibly make something that tantalizing to the eyes (a negative side effect for me) but  I get over pretty dang fast!

Plus when I really like the plot and characters it makes me think of the writers as, “geniuses,” and wonderful story tellers; and any of them with children have probably made their kids feel pretty lucky when they are getting story time at home. That just stems from my love for stories growing up, and the fun worlds that my cousins, friends and I made up.

As for the music… most of my playlists and CD’s have music from video game soundtracks; and many of them I have played over and over. The music for video games is just so amazing on my ears!

Now you have heard of my love for gaming, so here’s the list of my favourites. Perhaps some of you have them as your favourites too:

Atari: Kangaroo Jr, E.T., and Ice Caps

Coleco: Smurfs, Donkey Kong Jr., Pitfall,                Q-Bert, and B.C. Quest for Tires.

Nintendo: Super Mario 3.

Sega Genesis: Sonic the Hedgehog 2, Mortal Kombat 2, and Ecco the Dolphin series.

Playstation: Legend of Dragoon, Final Fantasy VII, Tombraider: Revelation, Parasite Eve.

Playstation 2: Final Fantasy X series, Kya Dark Lineage, Dirge of Cerberus.

Playstation 3: Ico Series in HD, God of War series, Katamari Forever, Final Fantasy XII series.

XBOX/XBOX 360: Dragon Age series, Thief: Deadly Shadows

Wii: Mario Kart, Epic Mickey, The Last Story

What are some of your favourites?

~Ange




Copyright 2014 Lucky 33: Stories, Experiences, Perspectives, and Opinions of a Woman Who Made It To Her Thirties.

A Lonewolf - July 9, 2014

Being a lonewolf.

I began to label myself as lonewolf long ago in my late teens when a few classmates referred to me as one. Then my friends expressed an agreement in that statement as well.  Though I am not sure of how many other people out there would want to say they are a lonewolf, my instincts tell me that there are a good number of us. Alas, I find there are perks to being a lonewolf, well, in the way that I consider myself to be one anyway.

I admit that there are many people in my life who are confused by the amount of time I can spend alone. They have even expressed surprise at my life filled with things I will do by myself.  These people are family members, coworkers, and even the closest of friends.  From my view it is not confusing at all, nor bad.  I like that time, I cherish it very much.  In writing about this, perhaps it will help others to understand about the way someone they know or care about spends a lot of alone time; maybe you have labelled them as a lonewolf.

I am aware of other ways people, maybe society in general, use the word lonewolf, but... I am focusing on people, who, maybe like me, appreciate a large portion of our lives to being on our own in using the term lonewolf.

Most words or statements I have usually heard about someone like me spending so much time alone are:
-Lonely, sad
-Antisocial
-Introverted and non-communicative
-Don't do anything really fun.

I could never give you a percentage of my alone time versus socializing periods, but the scale tips towards time by myself, that's for certain.  I know I am not sad, nor lonely.  I have met other people who have felt they require much of their time being alone, and I did not recall them being sad or lonely.  Quite the contrary, they were very animated.  They even seemed to be the life of the party.  Very chatty! Even when I am with others, I am a BIG talker myself.  I talk a lot; non-stop sometimes.  I ask many questions because I am actually very curious about the world around me, especially about other people; I love learning about others.  I know they say, "curiousity kills the cat," but alas, I cannot help it, and I have not been murdered or have had any horrible accidents as a result of it.  Clearly I have not been murdered, as I am writing away here. Obviously! Furthermore, when I get time to spend with my loved ones, I am thoroughly excited and it feels wonderful to be with them. After all, I love them!

These are the factors I know effect my lonewolf ways:
-depending on the number of people I am with, 
-the period of time I am with them,
-as well as the type of setting for socializing

Those three factors are the key to a good estimate of the amount of time I am going to be spending alone afterward.  Particularly if I am with people for more than one day in a row, and I go from one thing to another for more than two days, then its going to be that much longer where I go away. I will give you an example for a busy week for me:

One night I had dinner with friends, second night I attended a workshop, and the last night I went out with a group to see a movie.  I was a homebody after that movie night for two weeks.

Another good example is when I was nine years old.  I went to a summer camp for only about a week, but after that trip into the wilds with a whole bunch of people, I didn't socialize with friends or extended family for almost two months.  My parents were a bit concerned as I recalled when my pals would call asking to hang out and I made no move to go out.  I barely talked to my parents even.  I had just talked, worked with, and had learned about surviving in the wild with a group of a dozen people for a week; and it was amazing, fun, and one of the best times of my life, but, I was tired and needed my space for a good long while after that. It's the way of my lonewolf personality.

When I have that time to myself, I am able to recuperate, I get to be silent, have my space, and do whatever I wish to do. After I am rejuvenated; mind, body and soul.

The response I have gotten from certain parties is:
-concern for my health and well-being
-I have a screw loose
-I need to get out more
-If it was them having all that alone time it would be very, "depressing." A very dear friend of mine told me, "If I am not around people for about 98% of my day it makes me just want to slit my wrists," and they dramatically made the gesture to their arms of slicing them open. 

So far I do not seem to have anything wrong health-wise.  I have never been told I need someone to check my head to see if all the screws are in place, though I maybe I should because I never knew I had screws up there until I was told that.  I do go out, everyday for hiking and walking and it doesn't matter what the weather is.  However, if there was a natural disaster occurring, obviously I would stay inside, or, try to get away as fast as I could in a vehicle. I do not feel depressed for being alone or for any other reason for that matter; but if I did I would seek out loved ones and professionals to help me with that before I took a sharp object to my arms.  Even if I felt compelled to slit myself I would faint as I start to cut anyway I am sure, because some situations where I see blood are not good for my head.

For those reading you may already know, based on previous blogs, that I live in a city.  Not exactly a place to be a lonewolf, however, it gives me the life I want and offers anonymity.  Could it be that I grew up in rural areas? Small communities where everyone knows each others business? Surrounded in life by many who gossiped? Yes, all those things could very well have something to do with it.  However, back to how I love to learn about other people, I also meet many folks out here who teach me so much, including about other cultures.  Definitely not antisocial!

Now for the final argument, I do not do anything fun!

Apparently, unless you are hiding out in basements and working on little projects or video gaming all the time you are lonely and there is something wrong with that.  I think these thoughts are hilarious on a very personal level as most of my bedrooms growing up took place in basements where I gamed and worked on my hobbies much of my time.  I relished those years, and how much fun I had tinkering on all those things.

But what do I do for fun? ...Especially these days while many of my friends, even some family members and acquaintances enjoy clubs, bars, and parties. 

I go to:
-libraries and bookstores
-cafes and restaurants where I love the food and live music
-historical sites
-places that I love walking and hiking around
-movie theatres

At home:
-writing
-reading
-art projects
-play video games
-stretch
-pray and meditate
-research

That is fun to me. And what is fun to me is not fun for everyone else.  It's the way the world is.  Nor do I judge others on what they do for fun, unless their activities are doing damage to them or hurting other people then I would feel the need to step in. All any of us would like is acceptance and understanding, no matter how little or great the time we are spending with others, or what we do for fun. 
 ~Ange.





Copyright 2014 Lucky 33: Stories, Experiences, Perspectives, and Opinions of a Woman Who Made It To Her Thirties.

The Characters Of My World - July 8, 2014

This could also be titled, "The loves of my life."
I decided that when I am going to discuss about anything with regards to my family and friends, I should share who they are through their nicknames, and with a few sentences about each of them. However, my parents will be referred to as Mom and Dad, naturally. Out of everyone in my life there are seven people who will be mentioned the most, so I shall share some things about each of them here.

Mom: I do not look anything like her, and we are very different people. The joke I always make is that we look nothing nor sound anything alike, but, I have her blood type; which could possibly be the only thing I inherited. In fact no one even knows we are mother and daughter unless we clarify that we are. She is the most amazing woman in the work she does; always helping other people, and empowering them. Mom has been doing her type of work since before she was 20, and is one of those people who I truly believe has made the world a better place wherever she goes. She is a real hero, though the rest of the world may never know it. Many have called her their greatest friend they ever had, and an angel in their lives; both to the people she serves and her coworkers.

Dad: I am truly his daughter. I always tell people that I am a female clone of him. I have not followed in his footsteps in my choices of careers, but we both love to create with our hands, and enjoy physical labor in both our jobs as well as hobbies. He shows a great respect and appreciation for nature, animals, and other cultures. My sisters and I are very fortunate. Most of our friends do not have a positive relationship with their dads, but we do; and often people are surprised and cannot believe the love and closeness we have with our Dad. He always told me growing up, "I cannot tell my girls how to live their lives, for that is for them to choose. So long as you are happy, healthy and not harming others, then that makes me happy." If he felt we were unkind or overly harsh towards others he was quick to call us up on it.

Cam: My first sister, and several years younger than I. Cam is fearless, has little or no sense of pain, and is one of the funniest and most quick-witted people you will ever have the pleasure of knowing. Cam is exactly like our Mom. In fact if you line up pictures of them both, matching them to their ages, it is extremely hard to tell the difference. Cam even mistook a very old photo of Mom for a picture of herself. She is extremely protective of those near and dear to her, particularly toward our youngest sister.

Sam: Sam and I have an even bigger age gap between us than Cam and I. Sam is gorgeous, as everyone has always told us, and we are very aware of her beauty. Sam however is humbled by those statements, and does not understand why everyone calls her gorgeous. Which we all feel makes her even more beautiful. Super sweet, and very smart, she charms everyone who meets her. Sam and I share many of the same tastes and hobbies: books, video games, cartoons, (even anime), writing and drawing.

Big Brother: also known as my cousin, and has been the brother-figure in my life. He grew up an only child. A mere few years older than me, we were bonded to each other since the day I was born. We were quite inseparable growing up. He is larger than life, especially with that huge sense of humour of his. He also expresses phenomenal care and kindness for others; he's like this big sweet teddy bear. Big Brother is a gifted actor: giving awesome performances on stages, even doing various impersonations on top of the wide range of character voices he can do. Life would definitely have been awfully boring without him growing up. I hate the thought of him never being in my life.

Big Sis: my Aunt. She is the youngest of all my aunts, and is a mere six years older than I. Big Sis is whom I refer to my Aunt as, because she was like my big sister growing up. She is a teacher, mother, and I believe part reptile due to her love for the heat. Whenever she can find really hot places to go to, she will visit them just to lie in the sun all day long. Jamaica has been her place of choice for a getaway for a few years now. Big Sis is definitely one of my role models, and I have discovered that her life and mine has been quite similar as we get older; including our perceptions of the world and what we want for ourselves.

Bestie: my best friend! This is the one person outside of my family circle who I could not imagine never having been a part of my life; or worse, being a part of this world. I have anxiety attacks if I hold onto the thought of, "what if he wasn't in my life?" for too long. In the years we have known each other, and the closer we got, I know this for sure: he makes me want to be a better person, and we are so in sync it sometimes still surprises me, and I am a person who is not so easily surprised anymore; we enjoy many of the same things (places to go and things to do) we even share a lot of the same beliefs and thoughts about the world; we always make each other laugh; and we can sit in silence for long periods of time without saying a word to one another nor feel any need to... Instead we just enjoy the moment of being together. 
~Ange




Copyright 2014 Lucky 33: Stories, Experiences, Perspectives, and Opinions of a Woman Who Made It To Her Thirties.

What's Happening Lately - July 7, 2014

Here is a summary of what has been happening since I turned thirty, and a little bit more of a background on myself to start things off.

I grew up in rural areas of Canada; mainly on our family's farm and in small towns.

I am the oldest of three girls, with a large age gap between my sisters and I. We share the same parents who were told very early on in their married lives that due to our Mom's health she would be unable to have children. So, I was a surprise, my first sister was a surprise as well, and our youngest sister was the only one our parents planned for and succeeded in conceiving the first try. Which to this very day humours the youngest of our trio because she refers to us as follows:

Me: Big surprise!!!
Middle child: Woah! Lucky again!!!
Her: What were they thinking? You planned me?

I take it as a huge sign from the Big Guy in the universe that He had other plans for our parents, despite that the doctors could show a medical history that could prove to my Mom and Dad that their three girls shouldn't even exist! Alas, we do!

As of present, I am single, and have been for two and a half years and counting.
I have only dated, been in a relationship, and expressed my love in all ways possible to ONE person, ever. During the best of times in our relationship it was amazing; I felt like the luckiest person in the world. Then when things were at the opposite end, it was just too sad and hurtful. I should clarify that is was not so bad that it was absolutely toxic, nor was there ever a need for authorities to be involved or anything like that. But there were things that arose that made it difficult for us to be together anymore. I had always thought if it ended it wouldn't be me who would want it to end. But it was.

Furthermore I was surprised at how quickly I was over him. I never thought I would be that type of person whose love would dissipate so fast after a breakup, especially after being together for a long time. In fact, I used to look down upon others who were able to get over someone they had been with so quickly. I think I understand a little more clearly now as to why that is the case for some of us. However, I can only share from my point of view, due to my own experience.

I gave it my all. I did everything I felt I could possibly do to fix the bad that would rear its ugly head throughout the relationship. It was the only reason, in the end, I was able to walk away from the one I used to love with all my being, and quickly let go of that love.

I think it has only been recently that I am actually feeling any sort of desire to be open to the possibility of being with someone again. I think it has been due to a mix of: the unknown of the dating realm; the many crisis' my loved ones and I have faced in the past few years; and just enjoying life in the good times as much as I can (living in the moment). Now much of this will be rapidly changing due to a couple of major life-changing decisions I have made recently.

One is that in less than a month I will be leaving a job that I have been dedicated to for the past several years. I decided I needed to leave due to being burnt out, and to escape a working atmosphere that has become very foreign to me, and quite negative. It now seems to be a place that is in a perpetual state of crisis and drama. Second, is taking a lengthier vacation than I normally would, to spend time with my family, AND, reassess my life and where I go from here.

This can be summed up in three words since I made this decision:

Terrifying
Exciting
Relaxing

I typically do not do well without work, and spending long periods of time with family. Nor do I do well far from the life I have carved out for myself in the city. This all can be difficult for me.

However, I have felt my instincts and my spirit telling me for some time now that this is what I need to do. Otherwise the state of the workplace on top of personal crisis' with my loved ones is going to chip at my energetic, optimistic, happy-go-lucky self until I am so dark and cynical that I will be called an Ice Queen instead. This could lead to no one wanting to be around me; not even my loved ones.

Plus, my family and friends have been through so much. I can see myself getting into a situation where I have become so hopped up on my own issues that I may lose touch on what is happening with those I love.

Since making the decision I have felt the great weight lift; and my heart, mind, and soul all sync up and relax into a perfect balance. Even when I have moments of questioning, "What have I done?" I hear that still, quiet, strong voice in my head saying, "whatever will be will be." Either I am really crazy, or this was really meant to happen. Only time will tell. 
 ~Ange.



Copyright 2014 Lucky 33: Stories, Experiences, Perspectives, and Opinions of a Woman Who Made It To Her Thirties.

Who I Am, and About This Blog - July 6, 2014

My nickname is Ange, I am about to turn thirty-three! Hurray! I celebrate and rejoice in having made it this far; because in the past five years I have known many people both younger and older than me that have passed away before it seemed to be their time. I feel very fortunate to have made it this far. Reflecting that I have made it to thirty-three years makes me feel very blessed and ever-so grateful. I am truly thankful.

On a corny note about this age, I can hardly wait to start saying that number. 33!

Now, about this blog...

I am either really brave, or really silly for creating a spot where I am about to share a lot about myself and my life experiences. Perhaps others will also want to read and share here as well.
 What I am sharing is merely what I have learned about myself and my own little world around me along the way; which means this probably feel more like my, "thoughts of the week," or, "thought of the day," as well as a tool for me to reflect about everything in my life as I continue on my journey! Much like an open journal I guess is the best way to put it. ~Ange




Copyright 2014 Lucky 33: Stories, Experiences, Perspectives, and Opinions of a Woman Who Made It To Her Thirties.