Bestie - October 6, 2014

If it is not a female Bestie (best friend) that makes people think we may be a couple or they dwell heavily on why we spent so much time together… it is now everyone acting like they are utterly confused and interrogating me as to why my male Bestie and I spend a lot of time together but are not intimately interested in one another.  It seems, if I am not getting it on with a straight woman, or, a gay man, everyone is utterly confounded.  Umm… I am not sure why it is confusing… and with both of these people who I was blessed to have in my life (one of them past and one of them present) I can explain why they are, or, were once my best friends.  I think there are many people who will understand it too, for they have someone close to them… their own bestie!

I started off with the idea of an essay-styled story of my love I have had for my besties and how we are so close.  I changed my mind, because just like I have become ignorant and feel no need to explain to everyone who continually question my relationship with my besties, I suddenly realized I don’t feel like it here like I thought I might. I don’t feel obligated whatsoever anymore.  I loved her, I love him, and there is no explanation to provide anymore.  The friendship is what it is, and that’s all that matters to me. 

Having a love for them that is truly agape love (unconditional love) for these people I decided to list instead of how these frienships . 

Unfortunately the love for the female bestie, for those who may wonder, it died when I realized her love for me was conditional and filled with very negative thoughts and feelings towards me that I never felt toward her.

Here is what stands out the most in my relationship my Bestie, the best guy in the world:

Laugh all the time

Share and encourage our dreams, hopes, happiness, and support those goals

Lean on one another through good, bad, the ugly and the stupendous

Therefore we are there for one another no matter what the crisis is

Listen and give feedback, a confidant to each other

Know how to surprise one another pretty good

Walk or hike lots and take on all kinds of adventures

Common interests: teas, food, books, shops.

Where we are different (in whatever capacity) is not a big deal and does not affect the friendship, it often strengthens it.

Jokes only you two understand and the expressions on each other’s faces and not words (except the ones in your head) are a telltale that you are both thinking or judging in the exact same way about people or the situation

Appreciate nature and staring off into the scenery around us, or, explore it

Can be super comfortably silent with one another for any length of time

Have many of the same morals and philosophies

Family matters greatly to us

Some things with regards to other people’s confusion and need for the relationship to be labeled or explained just because it seems to be an issue for them that they need to (apparently) resolve, even though my friendships or any relationships has nothing to do with them. 

The thing I do know most is this, I love that Bestie and would do anything to protect him, and help him and take care of him.  Because he is the Best Bestie a friend could possibly ask for.

 

What are some great past times of you with Bestie? (For those who may be reading)

~Ange


Copyright 2014 Lucky 33: Stories, Experiences, Perspectives, and Opinions of a Woman Who Made It To Her Thirties.